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Monday, December 24th, 2007
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11:39 am - bravo
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in my dreams is the only place you ever truely dissapoint me. which means i dissapoint me. damn..
i had a dream this morning that i caught jon sleeping with colleene (i'm not sure how to spell her name.. so, i thought i'd just add all the possibilities there). then there was a chase scene, and i got cornered in a bathroom and forced to listen to his excuse. i don't remember what the excuse was, i think i may have woke up before he actually delivered the excuse. the dream kinda had the same feeling a dying dream does. it's real intense then you wake up right before it happens. god, colleene, stop dream sleeping with my husband!
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| Wednesday, December 12th, 2007
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1:28 pm - buhhhhh
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i'd rather peel my skin off than wash all those damn dishes right now.
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| Friday, November 16th, 2007
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3:55 pm - mhm
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just when i'm starting to feel beautiful again and getting back to my old self, comes a big fucking slap in the face by something i can never be.
so fuck you beauty queen. fuck you.
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| Thursday, October 25th, 2007
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2:13 pm
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there are 28 days left in my pregnancy, and i think i'm getting the fear. heh. i have dreams every night of taking care of her. none have been bad, which is reassuring, but these are my dreams. my thoughts everyday are full of questions and doubts. i know, though, that we will be great. we will do our best, and our best will be more than sufficient.
on the flip side-
there are 28 days left in my pregnancy, and i can't wait to smoke a joint. heh. a clove cigarette, mmmmmmmmmmm. there will still be a few months before i can drink again, aside from the occasional glass or two of wine, which i so dearly miss. mmmmmm, cigarettes and wine.
*sigh (and big smile)*
normal clothes again. normal size again, well almost. normal peeing schedule. normal sex. normal size ankles! sleeping on my stomach again!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
not that pregnancy hasn't been amazing and fun. i just can't wait to get back to normal again. the me that i learned to get comfortable with over 21 years. that's what i want back.
for now though, i'm nesting. i'm getting home ready for baby. cleaning, organizing, and being moody.
current mood:  excited
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| Monday, October 22nd, 2007
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4:08 pm
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i thought about your smell today
it made my heart dance
i wanted to hold you
and breath you in
i wanted to dance in my underwear for you
i thought about your eyes today
it made my stomach flutter
i wanted to kiss your eyelids
and lick your eye balls
i wanted to kiss you on the brain
i thought a lot about you today
it made me tingle all over
i wanted to see you
and cuddle you
i wanted to do a lot of wierd shit to you.
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| Tuesday, October 9th, 2007
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3:44 pm - i wrote this a while ago, but it's still funny.
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"Cellular"
my cellphone, it has a vibrating ring
it's crossed my mind
-you know what i'm talking about.
if some one called though,
how weird would that be?
so i keep my cellphone
on the loud ringer
and sometimes it rings.
-jenn
current mood:  cheerful
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2:58 pm - awe baby
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there is a light
at the end of this tunnel
there is a warmth
greater than my womb
there is love
in these arms
and i cannot wait
to share you
with the world
so the love of so many
can be wrapped around you.
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| Tuesday, September 25th, 2007
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6:39 am
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it feels like my baby is running a freaking marathon (not the gas station).
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| Wednesday, September 19th, 2007
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5:36 am - my fan is making me hear things
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i like to wait to go back to sleep till after the sun comes up. so from 5 30 till around 7 00 i'm awake farting around on the internet waiting for the sun to come up. i'm chicken shit in this little town all by myself.
yesterday i actually didn't have any trouble getting back to sleep which inturn had me awake at 8:30 in the morning. yesterday, i sat around almost all day feeling sorry for myself b/c i had no one to hang out with. my friends in bloomington, whom i haven't seen in forever are too busy, and my friends in lafayette are just too far away. sure, i know people down here in bedrock, but they're all jon's friends and with me not smoking weed, that rules out most of them. so am i really to be left here home alone all day expected to clean house and make dinner everynight and never have any friends. i sure hope not. and i know that is by no means the case, but yesterday as i sat around feeling sorry for myself, that's about all i could think. i just wanted my baby to come out right then. my mom, loving dearest mom, she keeps telling me to join something, or go to church. i have a feeling though, the kinda people here that go to church aren't the kinda people i want to be buddies with. everyone down here seems to be pretty narrow minded/gay hating/conservative/redneck/fucking weirdos... starting to sound like a todd snider song. which reminds me..
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Conservative Christian, right wing Republican, straight, white, American male.
Gay bashin’, black fearin’, poor fightin’, tree killin’, regioal leaders of sales
Frat housin’, keg tappin’, shirt tuckin’, back slappin’ haters of hippies like me.
Tree huggin’, peace lovin’, pot smokin’, porn watchin’ lazyass hippies like me.
Tree huggin’, love makin’, pro choicen, gay weddin’, widespread diggin’ hippies like me.
Skin color-blinded, conspiracy-minded, protestors of corporate greed,
We who have nothing and most likely will ‘till we all wind up locked up in jails
By conservative Christian, right wing Republican, straight, white, American males,.
Diamonds and dogs, boys and girls, living together in two separate worlds
Following leaders of mountains of shame, looking for someone to blame.
Diamonds and dogs, boys and girls, living together in two separate worlds
Following leaders of mountains of shame, looking for someone to blame.
I know who I like to blame:
Conservative Christian, right wing Republican, straight, white, American males,
Soul savin’, flag wavin’, Rush lovin’, land pavin’ personal friends to the Quayles
Quite diligently workin’ so hard to keep the free reins of this Democracy
From tree huggin’, peace lovin’, pot smokin’, barefootin’ folk-singin’ hippies like me.
Tree huggin’, peace lovin’, pot smokin’, porn watchin’ lazyass hippies like me.
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anyhow, sarah and ian, you guys need to move back up here asap.
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| Thursday, September 13th, 2007
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6:42 am - leave the past behind.... i love this song
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She turned away, what was she looking at?
She was a sour girl the day that she met me
Hey, what are you looking at?
She was a happy girl the day that she left me
What would you do?
What would you do if I follow you?
What would you do? I follow
Dont turn away, what are you looking at?
He was so happy on the day that he met her
Say, what are you looking at?
I was a superman, the looks are deceiving
The rollercoaster rides a lonely one
I pay the ransom note to stop it from steaming
Hey, what are you looking at?
She was a teenage girl when she met me
What would you do?
What would you do if I follow you?
What would you do? I follow
What would you do? ....
The girl got reasons
They all got reasons
What would you do? ....
Hey, what are you looking at?
She was a happy girl the day that she left me
The day that she left me / the day that she left me
She was a happy girl the day that she left me
The day that she left me / the day that she left me
She was a happy girl the day that she left me
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| Thursday, July 5th, 2007
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9:58 pm
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it's one of those cheeseball moments. i'm driving in the car with him, and all i can think is how much i love him, how in love i am with him, and every fucking thing about him that i love so much. it's one of those cheeseball moments that i'd never experienced before i met him. it makes me cringe to think i can be so cheeseballish, but it makes me smile to know i'm capable. i love cheese.
------------------------------
what a sweetie.... oh puppy!!!!
current mood:  happy
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| Saturday, June 9th, 2007
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1:00 pm - meet virginia
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She doesnt own a dress, her hair is always a mess
If you catch her stealin, she wont confess
Shes beautiful
She smokes a pack a day, oh wait, thats me but anyway
She doesnt care a thing about that, hey,
She thinks Im beautiful
Meet virginia
She never compromises, loves babies and surprises
Wears hi-heels when she exercises
Aint that beautiful
Meet virginia
Well she wants to be the queen
Then she thinks about her scene
Pulls her hair back as she screams
I dont really wanna be the queen
Her daddy wrestles alligators, mama works on carburetors
Her brother is a fine mediator for the president
Well here she is again on the phone
Just like me hates to be alone
We just like to sit at home, and rip on the president
Meet virginia
Well she wants to live her life
Then she thinks about her life
Pulls her hair back as she screams
I dont really wanna live this life
She only drinks coffee at midnight, when the moment is not
Right, her timing is quite-unusual
You see her confidence is tragic, but her intuition magic
And the shape of her body - unusual
Meet virginia-i cant wait to
Meet virginia-yea.
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a song that will forever remind me of sarah.
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jon and i both had dreams last night we were arguing with each other. in my dream he openly cheated on me. he didn't get into all the dirty details of what i did in his, but i can surely imagine. somewhere within both of us we're fearing our true loyalty towards each other. it kinda made me giggle, not at the fear, more at the similarities of the fear.
if you promise and if i promise, i swear your dreams will be the only place in this world i'll ever dissapoint you. :)
anywho, when the moment is not right
i'll see you then,
peacelovejenn
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| Tuesday, April 10th, 2007
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12:46 pm - have i told you that you smell bad
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so, i'm due on Nov. 22, Thanksgiving. i think that'd be great, seeing as how i've missed about 15 of the 20 thanksgivings i've been around for. they say thanksgiving babies were conceived on valentine's day. how cute. i find out on monday if it's twins. yay! lots of little jonjenn's running around. heh.
being pregnant is awesome. i get so much free shit. free food, free healthcare. pretty much get to live off the gov't. except they don't pay the rent at this damn place i like to call bar-ca-lay, kinda like broccoli.
blah- i'm so bored today, i've just watched thank you for smoking, and now i want a clove. bored and wanting to smoke. maybe i'll just get high. yep gone.
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| Saturday, January 27th, 2007
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1:59 pm - take each others hand
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Vow your eternal love.
Jennifer Elizabeth Foster,
Today, as I take your hand in marriage it is my honor to be in your presence. I celebrate you as a person and as an individual. Though on this day our souls may be united, I wish for you to forever grow to better understand yourself and the infinite love that surrounds you. I pray that everyday you count your blessings and find yourself in abundance. It is my vow to you to love you forever, and learn to love you better with each passing day, to treat you with the respect in which any mother, sister, daughter, and wife should be given.
It is also my vow to you to never take you, or your love for granted, but to each day also count my blessings and cherish every moment I have to be with you in your love, may we never stop holding each others hands.
Jon,
From the first time I knew I could love you, to the first time I knew you loved me, you have never left my thoughts.
And today as we are joined, I still think of all the ways I have loved you and the reasons I will continue to love you,
For your soul is pure and honest,
You never forget how to play,
And you can read my eyes like a book you’ve written.
For these reasons and thousands more, I look forward to staying warm with you in the winters to come and warmer in the summers. Through all these seasons, I promise to keep you next to me through sunshine and shadow, and never leave you astray.
Jon Ellis Key, I want to hold your hand for the rest of my life, and let our souls be united for eternity.
current mood: cheerful
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1:53 pm - birthday
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YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Wednesday, December 13th, 2006
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2:04 am - a christmas tree redone
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jon and i redid our christmas tree tonight. it had been starting to look quite disheveled, and we didn't have a tree topper :( that, and after watching jake and erin fix up there tree, i was jealous of all their lights. so, we added a string of lights and redid all the garland and ornaments. for a topper jon designed the brightest star EVER. and i decorated it lovely. after the final assembly of the whole ordeal, we dimmed the lights and sat so contently in each others arms dreaming ghosts of christmas pasts and talking about christmas futures.
it was a good night.
current mood: excited
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| Wednesday, November 22nd, 2006
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5:59 pm - a song for sarah...
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heh- i heard this song on myspace, and it cracked me up. i know sarah would love it, so i'm posting it for her.
the beer i had for breakfast was a bottle of mad dog
and my 20/20 vision was fifty percent off
you said punch-buggy red and punched me right in my left eye
i said don't you mean pediddle? and i lit his house on fire
he came home on acid i was holding his shotgun
i was dressed like tina turner in beyond thunder dome
he said don't shoot, i said i won't i love you you're my friend
i handed him my wig and shot myself in the head
then i stuffed a box of tissues in the hole in my skull
i got in my mazda and i drove to the mall
i got a big johnson shirt and some silicone tits
when i pulled out the tissues they were covered with shit
and the beer i had for breakfast was a box of cheap white wine
and the boom box on my shoulder was a box of clementines
i ate every single one without noticing the mold
you said you're gross my darling, i said no i'm rock and roll
even though i'd never ever been in a band
i got cool as black ice tattooed on my hand
and the christians gave me comic books as if i would be scared
of burning in hell well i was already there
and the beer i had for breakfast silver bullet in the brain
and the beer i had for lunch was a bottle of night train
and the beer i had for dinner was my crazy neighbor's pills
we had to sit down on skateboards jut to make it down the hill
then i peed my pants and you stole the groom's cigar
and some old man made me watch him masturbate locked in his car
when i got back to the apartment you were face down on the floor
you said don't go to bed yet let's go get a 64
and the beer i had had for breakfast was a pint of jim beam
and a fifth of peach schnapps and some warm sunny d
and you said bottoms up just as i bottomed out
i tried to scream fuck you but blood was pouring out my mouth
evan dando never planned on telling you the truth
and your leonardo i.d. card is your fountain of youth
you can be a teenager for your whole fucking life
just find some pretty sucker and make that bitch your wife
i guess by now you all know my friends danny broke his neck
he was driving home from sirens when he got into a wreck
first i cried for him and then i cried for me
haunted by the ghost of the girl i used to be
but the rocks with holes are warm in my hands
and i buried my toes in the hot hot sand
and the silver pink pony kisses me and says
you've come a long, long way and you deserve to be really happy
current mood:  good
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| Monday, November 6th, 2006
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9:05 pm - vows
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i was trying to wright my wedding vows earlier and was surprised. i figured something like this would just come pouring out of me, but i keep getting stumped. i can't find a structure. i'm trying not to push it, figuring that sooner or later it's just gonna hit me what i should be writing.
while i was trying to write i was interrupted by an unexpected phone call. it was shane. i love when he calls. i can say that he was one of my best friends growing up, and i really feel like i was his best friend. and wouldn't you know, he's having a baby too. heh-
anywho, jon started his new job this evening. and it has felt like he's been gone forever. god... him working two jobs is going to suck. it makes me sad, and lonely. i'll get used to it i suppose. maybe actually do something next time he leaves for work. MAYBE.
well, i've got cheerios to eat, so peace out.
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| Tuesday, October 31st, 2006
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3:57 pm - i barely have to touch the "s" key for an "s" to appear.
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Well a man come on the 6 oclock news
Said somebodys been shot, somebodys been abused
Somebody blew up a building
Somebody stole a car
Somebody got away
Somebody didnt get too far yeah
They didnt get too far
Grandpappy told my pappy, back in my day, son
A man had to answer for the wicked that he done
Take all the rope in texas
Find a tall oak tree, round up all of them bad boys
Hang them high in the street for all the people to see that
Justice is the one thing you should always find
You got to saddle up your boys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles well sing a victory tune
Well all meet back at the local saloon
Well raise up our glasses against evil forces
Singing whiskey for my men, beer for my horses
We got too many gangsters doing dirty deeds
Weve got too much corruption, too much crime in the streets
Its time the long arm of the law put a few more in the ground
Send em all to their maker and hell settle em down
You can bet hell set em down cause
Justice is the one thing you should always find
You got to saddle up your boys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles well sing a victory tune
Well all meet back at the local saloon
Well raise up our glasses against evil forces
Singing whiskey for my men, beer for my horses
current mood: cheerful
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| Sunday, October 1st, 2006
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9:03 pm
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i'm getting married.
it feels incredible.
he asked on september 29.
the date is set for december 16.
this makes me smile a lot.
i have this amazing feeling of contentedness.
my family will soon quadruple in size.
WOOOOO!!!!!!
current mood:  content
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